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Blood Bowl XIV

Outside the arena before the match the Chaos coach spotted the Undead coach and asked "Are you ready for the carnage?" The good natured chuckle which followed was described otherwise in the Undead locker room as they came out fired up and ready to deliver some carnage of their own.

The Undead team was greatly overmatched and was able to get a wizard and a pair of BW babes to help out. It seems that Certain Hurtin' was so overconfident and got so drunk the night before he was Really Stupid for this game (Duh, Where am I?). The crowd was determined to play their part in the match as Chaos had the benefit of Friendly Fans while the Undead team had Rowdy fans on their side.

At the opening kickoff the fans for both teams cheered loudly enough to inspire each team enough for an additional reroll. The Undead received the kick and proceeded to pound their way downfield. After the first two turns there were 2 dead Beastmen (worthless Apoth), another one badly hurt and a KOed Warrior, probably not the carnage the Chaos coach was expecting. The Chaos squad fought for the ball and made their opponents work to advance it. Desptite the hangover the Minotaur worked to get close to the ball and the leaping Chaos Warrior also tried to pry it loose. This did slow down the undead cage but the Chaos players continued to leave the pitch. By the time the Undead walked into the Endzone there were 4 cas'ed and 4 KOed Chaos players. All 4 KOed players were able to wake up for the second half so Chaos started the half only down by a single man.

Despite the pounding they had endured the Chaos team showed their power by giving it back to the undead. Early in the drive the wizard tossed in a fireball knocking down all 4 Chaos players in the blast zone. A Ghoul had a clear shot at the ball and some open field but was unable to pick it up. In response to this failure, casulaties and KOs were issued by the mighty Chaos team, leaving their opponents with 3 left on the pitch by the time they scored. During this drive and the 2 turns following the Undead was able to take out a few more Chaos players as well. The difference leading to OT was the undead had a started with a full bench, regeneration, and 2 BW babes while Chaos started with a bench of 3 (and a worthless apoth) so were unable to absorb the damage as easily.

Despite starting OT with just 7 players which included all 4 Warriors and the Minotaur the Chaos team was still dangerous. The Chaos squad was relieved to receive and was especialy happy that the crown got involved in their favor by KOing a wight with a thrown rock. Once the ball was kicked Chaos started to pound on their rivals. However, the Minotaur finally messed up a block (blowing the last TRR in the process) and ended their turn early. The undead team was able to strike back on the line and their unmarked speedy players swarmed into the backfield to challenge the lone Beastman back for the ball. The undead were able to knock the ball loose and stun the ballcarrier. The Chaos counterattack around the ball ended with a failed block. With the ball (and a championship) lying in the endzone Holy Hand Grenade II was able to dodge away from a Chaos Warrior and pick up the ball to bring home the trophy.

Blood Bowl XIII

Well I guess the high ticket prices and constant rain kept the orc fans away from this one since the turnout was much lower than in the semifinals. But those orc and chaos fans that did come out witnessed one heck of a final match. Both teams came out swinging and there were numerous casualties on both sides of the ball.

BHK were able to get on the board first when despite being down players they were able to capitalize on a friendly crowd throw and scoop up the ball and run it in for the 1-0 lead. the half ended after a few more rounds of punches being thrown and minimal offense.

After the halftime festivities Dynamo came out and tried to move the ball down field. it was a slow brutal affair that saw a poorly executed orc cage that allowed a direct shot on the ball carrier. The ball remained loose though and despite the pouring rain Rathor scooped it up and flipped a quick pass to Buurk who rambled down field and scored to tie it.

There was still plenty of time left though and BHK mounted one more drive to try to win it in regulation. unfortunately it ended with a dropped pass in the endzone. So those fans that did brave the bad weather were gonna be treated to sudden death over time!

Dynamo won the toss and lined up looking confident that the game might just be in hand. the blocking didn't let up in OT as more players from both sides left the pitch on stretchers. BHK got in one of the best shots and took Braalg out. Rathor rose to the challenge though and eventually got the ball back and fired a strike to Buurk who was open once again. As he ran down the field every BHK player tried to get back into a prevent defense. He could not be stopped though and delivered one final blitz before scoring the game winner.

There will be much celebration in the homelands this evening.

Blood Bowl XI

Once again, the eyes of the world turned to the pageantry that is the Blood Bowl. Blood Bowl XI was not for the faint of heart as the forces of darkness and chaos, embodied by 30,000 wailing fans, filled OBBL Stadium to capacity. Neither Horn to the Groin nor Some Kind of Monsters expected a high scoring, wide open affair. Both sides realized that their path to glory lay in the punishment that only a concentrated ground game could provide.

As has become customary, the MVP of the preceding Blood Bowl met the team captains at center pitch for the ceremonial coin toss. The fans hissed as mighty Hamlet, famed Lightning Rider blitzer, hero of BBX and spokeself for Block & Dodger Power Tools, flipped the coin. Horn's fans roared as their team won the toss and elected to receive.

The fans and the chaos gods screamed for blood as the teams set up for kickoff. Horn's fans howled with delight as Surely I'll Be Crippled took the field with a bag chocked full of Gromskull's Exploding Runes. The pro-Monster contingent saw their club employ some dirtiness of their own as The Livermore Larupper took the field sporting a fresh pair of Kicking Boots. With the teams ready to roll, The Larupper put boot to ball and BBXI was under way. Brilliant coaching came into play as Gyewhinr settled under the ball as the Horn looked poised to take the title.

Soon after Gyewhinr had corralled the ball, Surely began pitching runes about the pitch, knocking several Monsters to the turf. The teams traded blows as Gyewhinr made his way up the pitch. As the Horn's ground game set up, The Greatest saw a slight opening and blitzed his way in, knocking Gyewhinr to the pitch and popping the ball loose. Several players rushed for the ball. Surely saw the scrum and smartly tossed an exploding rune into the fray. His aim was true as the rune sent three Monsters to the pitch, which opened up an opportunity for the Horn to recollect the ball. Kid Dynamite, on his back and covered near the sideline, overestimated his dodging abilities and crashed to the turf with a crunch, resulting in the game's first casualty. A moment later, Lm-Shibdeteh collected a routine handoff with elf-like agility and charged toward the open endzone. Unfortunately, he slipped on some confetti from the pre-game festivities and hit the turf just shy of the goal line, fumbling the ball into the endzone. The Larupper and Dr. Steelhammer converged on the ball. Steelhammer flubbed the pickup into the stands and into the hands of a Horn aficionado, who tossed it in Awowatebuko's direction, although the beastman was momentarily down. Awowatebuko was on his feet in a flash as he scooped up the ball and charged into the zone. 1-0 Horn.

As the teams reset for kickoff, the officials gave Surely the heave-ho (much to the fans' consternation). After some uneventful grabassing, the first half came to a close. The Horn was halfway home.

The teams exited the pitch for the halftime festivities, which included two 100 foot inflatable Mr. Potato Heads, one dressed as everyone's favorite Dark Lord of the Sith and the other dressed as a certain smart-mouthed astromech droid. The chaotic fans, who knew a thing or two about a galaxy far far away, clapped and cheered like a throng of drunken Ewoks as the teams emerged from the locker rooms. Again, boot met ball and the 2nd half was underway.

The second half began as Buster dropped deep to take the kickoff. The Gentlemen also dropped back to cover him as the dwarves did their jobs up front, knocking several beastmen to the turf. The Larupper, being the dirty hobgoblin he is, booted a fallen beastman in the groin, knocking him out. Some blocking and blitzing from The Greatest and Smokin' Joe opened up a running lane for Buster down the left sideline. After a sustained drive that ate up a good portion of the second half, Buster danced into the endzone nearly unmolested, evening up BBXI at 1-1.

The teams set up again as they saw time slipping away in the 2nd half. The Horn found themselves down a man as they received the kickoff. Some Horn and Monster fans took the opportunity to add some injury of their own, tossing rocks at and stunning both Gyewhinr and Big George. Some blocks were thrown and some dwarves were turfed as Okwego dashed back to take the kickoff, but he was unable to find the handle. The Greatest, Smokin' Joe and The Gentlemen took the initiative and dashed up the pitch, hoping to cause enough chaos to get a last chance to make a play on the ball before the half expired. Okwego finally collected the ball and charged up the pitch. Upamrus blitzed The Gentleman, but being a blodger is a good thing and The Gentleman kept his feet. With time almost out in the second half, The Greatest broke free of Gyewhinr's cover and blitzed Okwego, popping the ball free deep in Horn territory. The Gentleman, somehow sensing destiny, slipped free of Upamrus' cover, pounced on the ball and hustled for everything he had, crossing the goal line at the last possible instant. 2-1 Monsters.

A final kickoff and some meaningless blocks later, Some Kind of Monsters found themselves at Destiny's doorstep. With a 2-1 victory in BBXI, Lady Destiny greeted the Monsters with open arms.

Lightning Riders Win BBX

Under clear skies, 32,000 screaming maniacs filled OBBL Stadium to witness the glorious spectacle that was Blood Bowl X. The Riders took the pitch aided by twin wrestling merc lineelves and one elderly elven wizard. Neither side's fans were able to provide the teams any added bonus. The captains strode to center pitch to witness The Lawnmower (MVP of BBIX) flip the ceremonial coin. DDK won the toss and elected to receive.

Just before kickoff, a drunken DDK fan found a rock and hummed it at Titus Andronicus. The fan's aim was true, sending Titus to the emergency room before BBX had even begun. Already down a man, the Riders slowly gave ground while Rigka corraled the ball and charged toward his waiting cage. A few moments later, the Riders' wizard saw his chance and hurled a mighty fireball at the dwarven cluster, sending three beardies (and the ball carrier) to the pitch. Tybalt, spearheaded by Hamlet's blitzing prowess, saw his opportunity to scoop up the ball and charge toward the endzone. Another critical Hamlet block seemed to clear Tybalt's path to the zone, but alas, DDK's trapmakers had foreseen such troubles and managed to sucker Tybalt into a waiting pit trap. However, luck was with the Riders' star catcher as the trap only shot him one square, but Tybalt goofed the landing. Hamlet was again in position to cover Tybalt as Tybalt scrambled to his feet and scooped up the ball to break the deadlock. 1-0 Riders.

The refs quickly sent Spikey to the locker room for cheating and the teams set up again. However, just as the ball was kicked, the Riders were able to spring immediately into action, blitzing their way through the dwarven line in order to pounce on the onside kick. The dwarves, who by now were starting to send more elves to the emergency room, managed to surround Hamlet, who had caught the onside kick. Hamlet handed the ball off to Tybalt, who dashed by a waiting longbeard. A moment later, Tybalt again found himself in the endzone. 2-0 Riders.

Now late in the first half, the teams set up for another kickoff, but AGAIN the Riders managed to take the initiative and again blitzed their way through the line in an attempt to get at the ball. However, DDK responded this time and Rigka scooped up the ball and tossed a short pass to Kelo, who was set up for a charge down the left flank. However, Rigka's pass was off the mark, which allowed the Riders to make yet another play on the ball. Shylock blitzed his way to the ball but flubbed the pick up, giving DDK the opportunity they needed, as both Yulan and Tsenb had worked their way open down field. A short cage later and DDK was in position for their first score, until Hamlet's downfield coverage stopped the drive, knocking Tsenb to the pitch. The half ended with the Riders up 2-0.

DDK's fans saw that their team needed some help, as the Dead -Eyed Rock Thrower again saw his opportunity at the beginning of the second half. The rock thrower's aim wasn't as deadly this time, merely stunning Benvolio. Caesar scooped up the kickoff and started to play ball control. DDK advanced and Caesar panicked, sending a premature pass to Tybalt, who dashed up the sideline. Some nimble dodging from Yulan resulted in both Tybalt and the ball flying into the stands. DDK eventually recovered the ball and marched downfield, but by now the clock had begun to work in the Riders' favor. Kelo found his way into the endzone late in the half, cutting the Riders' lead to 2-1.

After the next kickoff, Shylock quickly snatched the ball and set up the Victory Formation, taking a knee and securing the title. The Elven Kingdoms are partying tonight, for their Lightning Riders are BBX champions.

Jolly Lumberjacks take BBIX

Despite two Pitch Invasions and a Riot, the Jolly Lumberjacks managed to grind their way through the Lightning Riders to a 2-1 victory in regulation to take Blood Bowl IX.

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